I think I'm me again, world!

I now feel like me.  We re-balanced my medications and I feel much much better.   This is the first time in my life that I have medication which required such close scrutiny.  Hopefully I will not be on these for too long.  This is a powerful lesson learned.
April and I went to the Prairie Grove Clothesline Fair this morning.  The sun was shining, we met several nice people, and I bought a small wooden cabinet to organize my junk.  I believe this is the first item I've bought strictly for myself from a craft fair. Maybe I need to check those meds again.  We met a talkative woman who was also an amputee.  She had some recomendations and prostetics and life in general.  We left as it was becoming hot and ate lunch at Jim's Razorback Pizza.  We like their Spanish Pie.
I'm torn about using the handicapped parking spaces.  I am handicapped, but others need it more than me.  So far it's a case by case parking situation.   We've used it at Walmart and I-Hop (that's funny right there), but not at Denny's or Jim's Razorback.  It all depends on the terrain.  Some parking lots are not conducive to wheel chairs.  Example:  The parking at the Fayetteville Best Buy has a long slope.  It does not look like much, but that is a chore in a wheel chair.  It's doable, but we used the special parking.
I appreciate the special notes from my last post.  Normally I would not share such things, but I want everyone who may read this to know that there are hard days.  Having cancer and losing a limb are painful and traumatic events.  There are good days and bad.  There are good hours and bad.  The goal is to have more good and to find that little bit of good which is hiding in the bad.
My final thought of the day: People say 'every cloud has a silver lining.'  This is wonderful until a silver laden cloud comes crashing down around you.  It hurts.

It's not all sunny skies

The past 3 days have been long, stressful, painful, and almost completely not pleasant.  April said I finally 'broke'.  I say I suffered from a biochemical imbalance.  In either case it was not fun.
Everything started on Tuesday when I was still in the hospital.  I was far weaker after the lung surgery than after the leg surgery.  I could barely breathe and therefore barely do anything else.  I think this started a chain reaction which deeply bruised my self-confidence.  The lost confidence degraded my ability to handle pain, which lowered my ability to do things, and repeat.  When I left the hospital on Wednesday my self-confidence was about 30% of normal.  Between my leg, both real and phantom, and my back the pain levels were pretty high and my pain tolerance was pretty low. 
April and I stayed in Little Rock that night.  I had left over pain pills so I did not get the new prescription filled.  This was a mistake.  I could not roll over because of the pain in my back.  I was constipated and I think this was pressing on my sciatic nerve, which caused more leg pain and some general discomfort.  I pressed on until the pain was more than I could take then we found a 24-hour Walgreens.  During all this I took extra gabapentin which is supposed to help with the phantom pains.
Thursday we met Chris for lunch and drove home.  The whole day was spent trying to control the pain.  I took oxycodone, gabapentin, ibuprophen.  Everything helped a little, but nothing stopped it.   It's important to know that I had several distinct pains to deal with.  Each pain with its own medicine and its own lifecycle.
When we got home I was tired and grumpy and more tired and more grumpy.  By bedtime I've taken a lot of medicines, probably too much.  April and I go to bed and after a short conversation I emotionally explode about everything.  I spend most of the next 30 hours crying about things.  Everything is emotionally magnified and traumatic to me.  I cried because Loki (our little dog) was my friend.  I cried because Coacoa (our cat) was my friend.  I cried about everything.  Poor April was trying her best to console the inconsolable.  This was my world all day Friday too.
Saturday started about the same. It was a little better, but not much.  April contacts the doctor on-call for Dr Kiser, who proscribed the gabapentin.  We contact Dr Means and he says to change the dosage.  I think I overtook the gabapentin on Wedneday-Thursday.   It works on your nerves abd a side affect is depression.
I felt better by Saturday afternoon.  Terah visited and brought etoufee for lunch, which was yummy.  She also helped me prepare the hot tub for water.  Then we went to my dad's and ate BBQ ribs, which was super yummy.  Then I fell asleep in their living room.  We went home and I went to bed.  April woke me up at 7:30pm and I ate a sandwhich and I went back to bed.  I slept most of the night.
Now it's Sunday.  My leg is still soar, I feel much more like me.  I will watch my medicines more closely and my journey continues.

Preparing to leave Little Rock

Last night was a very long night.  I thought that I could use my existing pain medication until I got home.  I was wrong.  At 11pm I was up trying to find a 24hour pharmacy to fill my new medicines.  Those allowed me to sleep.  For some reason I still woke up every 2 hours.
This morning was my first shower since the 10th.  The hot water felt very good.  I can not soak yet, but I can shower and scrub.
Breakfast at the Wingate by Wyndham was exquisite.  I had eggs and sausage and toast and a biscuit and I ate all I wanted.  The hospital food was good, but eating on the outside is so much better.
We are preparing to leave the hotel and head home.   We'll stop several times to stretch so home is still several hours away.  I want to visit 'The Container Store' before we leave Little Rock.  Terah and Patrick went there when they were here.  They may have handy containers for my new chair or walker.  And I want to see a store which sells nothing but containers.  How cool is that?!  If only 'Spatula City' was next door.  That would be the bomb!
I'll report later about 'The Container Store' and I'll see some of you soon.

I'm out of hospital

I am out of the hospital and now resting in the hotel with April.  Trish and family will visit soon and I do adore that baby.  Maybe we'll chat in the hotel or maybe  walk-n-roll around the local mall.  Whatever we do it will be in AC.
I'm still leaking from some small holes, but I'm glad to be out.

That was a room full of white coats

Dr Montgomery and his team of 4 came in.  They looked at my leg stitches and then removed them!  Awesome!  We also talked about the tumor and my long term prognosis.
The pathology department identified my tumor as bone related.  I do not remember the long name.  This partially explains why it did not respond to the previous chemo, but it also means that I have more chemo coming.  While Dr Montgomery's team removed my stitches Dr Stelig and his team of 4 came in.  There were 6 doctors, 4 students, and me in the room.  My nurse (Shelly) looked in and said she would come back later. 
Dr Stelig said everything looked good and I will be out today.  Both doctor said my margins (the flesh surrounding the removed tumors) was clear, which is tremendous news!  I still get more chemo in Fayetteville, but this is precautionary.
As I write this I am setting in a normal chair, I have an IV in my left hand, but it's not attached to anything, I can breathe nearly normally, and I have a full tummy.  Breakfast was very good, but that may be because I'm in a good mood.  I am not attached to anything and I have no stitches.
My job today is to wait patiently.  I expect to be out today, but it could be any time from now to 10 tonight.  April and I may drive home or we may stay in Little Rock one more night.  This primarily depends on when I'm released and then on how we feel.  In either case I will sleep next to April tonight.
Upcoming:  I will call Dr Montgomery's office on Friday afternoon.  They will setup another appointment on a Tuesday so I can see both Dr Montgomery and Dr Stelig on one day.  I expect to get a fresh chest x-ray that day and maybe another CT scan.  They will also coordinate with Highland Oncology in Fayetteville so I can get more Chemo. 
That's all for now.  I feel good and I'm raring to go.

It's Wednesday and I'm OK

Wednesday morning is here and I am doing much better.  They gave me a breathing exercise apparatus on Monday.  If you've been hospitalized then I'm sure you've had one of these.  Monday I could barely inhale 500ml.  I could inhale nearly 1200ml by the end of Tuesday.  This morning I can inhale a little more than 2000.  I think 2000 is within the normal range.  Prior to the surgery I could get to 3000 so this is my goal.
Dr. Stelig's team visited at 6:45am.  They say I'm doing well and I expect to be discharged today.  The pain associated with the chect surgery is mostly gone.  Using my upper body is still a strain, but I can get up and down and move around the room.
The pain from the leg surgery is now center stage.  I need to get back on my regular perscriotions so I can restart my exercises and recovery.
...doctors are here.  More to come...

Tuesday evening

It's still Tuesday.  April returned to the hotel and I finished dinner.  I am much better now than this morning. I slept several hours last night but it was only 15-20 minutes in any one segment.  I knew this would hurt, but I did not anticipate that much pain or exhaustion.
They removed my chest tube from my back around lunch.   The tube was inserted between some ribs for better stability.  Ribs are tough, but this small tube felt like a 3 inch PVC pipe.  It took a few hours to adjust, but I can lay on my back now without too much discomfort.  The act of laying down still hurts, but I can stay there once I reach the bed.  The adjustable hospital bed helps this.
Charlette, Aprils step-mom, and Denise, Aprils step-sister, left this afternoon.  These are wonderful people.  I was glad for their visit.  I expect to see our niece Trish and her family tomorrow. 
I think the first 30 hours of this recovery is worse than the first 30 of my leg removal.  I am getting better faster and I expect the next 30 hours to be full of recovery.  I also hope to be released tomorrow.  In any case we'll stay in Little Rock until Friday for the follow up appointment about my leg surgery.  I believe they will remove my stitches on Friday, which will make me very happy.
I need to ask both the leg and chest doctor about my return to work.  I plan to return on September 2, but I need the official OK from the doctors.  I'll need some time off and flexability for appointments, but I really miss my friends.
That's all for now.  It's only 6:30 pm, but it's sleep time for me.
More later.